Justin Bieber vs. North Korea

What can he say? The Dear Leader loves him some Bieber.

Teen/Twitter idol (and probable hoax) Justin Bieber recently held an online vote to decide which country he should tour next. Somehow, the geniuses running the polling left every country on the table. Yes, every country. When the crazy cats over at 4chan got word of this, you can pretty much guess how they followed up their “Justin Bieber syphilis” prank from last month.

Yep, they (allegedly) stuffed the ballot box for North Korea. While Justin’s been mum so far on whether or not he plans to perform in Pyongyang, we think that maybe the internet is giving those 4chan folks too much credit. We need to consider the fact that Kim Jong-il himself might be behind this. After all, the “Dear Leader” is known to be a huge fan of the western culture he bans within his own country, so it’s not that far-fetched to think that he’s come down with a case of Bieber Fever. Assuming that Kim does in fact love Justin Bieber with the fire of any North American tween girl, he might very well employ his country’s extensive cyber war assets (as well as his own Internet expertise) in order to rig the vote in North Korea’s favor. The only move left for Kim to complete his nafarious plot is to respond to the vote by publicly welcoming Bieber (and supporting act Sean Kingston) to North Korea for a special performance. (If all this seems a little too crazy, keep in mind that in 1978 Kim had noted South Korean film director Shin Sang-ok and his wife kidnapped and forced them to make films produced by Kim, so this kind of thing is entirely plausible in the topsy-turvy world of North Korea.)

Regardless of who’s behind North Korea’s win at the polls, we hope Justin follows through and goes to the Hermit Kingdom. It could be the best thing to happen there since–well, ever.