Week 10 NFL Predictions: In Which We Are Forced to Praise Mark Schlereth (Plus Week 9 Results!)

Sure, we make fun of him, but based on this photo from Mark Schlereth's playing days in Denver, he's really slimmed down.

Happy Friday! It seems as if there was an exciting football game last night. We wouldn’t know, however, as the powers that be have not yet decided to grant us access to the NFL Network, and we’re not holding our breath.

But enough! We can’t remain glum with a full slate of NFL football games set for this weekend, especially in light of Mark Schlereth‘s excellent 10-3 showing last week. As annoying as he is, he’s been good to us since we’ve let him make our football picks. (Remember that our current scheme is to use the picks of whichever ESPN “expert” got the most correct picks the week prior.)

Sure, some other “experts” also went 10-3, but since Schlereth kept the pace, we’re sticking with him. Hit the jump to see what Mark predicts for this week along with our rationalizations!

(Per our new custom, the winning team is in bold and italics. We’re using ESPN “expert” Mark Schlereth’s picks since he had the best Week 9 record.)

Lions at Bills
Detroit is going to do its best to make sure they’re not the only team to have gone 0-16. Buffalo will likely comply.

Vikings at Bears
Minnesota got a much-needed win last week. From here out every game’s a must-win for them, and a struggling Chicago squad looks like a pretty ripe divisional target.

Jets at Browns
Cleveland has knocked off two of the NFL’s best teams in consecutive weeks. They’ll come up short of the trifecta, though against a hungry Jets team eager to reassert their dominance.

Bengals at Colts
Cincinnati somehow managed to give Pittsburgh a game last Monday night, but does anyone really think they stand a chance in Indianapolis?

Titans at Dolphins
Tennessee is a strong team coming off a bye week. Miami is winless at home and had just switched quarterbacks. Advantage Tennessee.

Panthers at Buccaneers
At this point, it doesn’t matter who starts at QB for Carolina. They’re terrible, and against a very-OK team like Tampa, they’ll lose handily.

Texans at Jaguars
Jacksonville has had a week off to prepare for this division game, but we’re still betting that the bad version of the team shows up against a Houston squad eager to prove they’re not as bad as you think.

Chiefs at Broncos
In Denver, the second road division game in two weeks for Kansas City will go very differently from last week’s overtime loss.

Cowboys at Giants
New coach, same old embarrassingly bad Dallas team. Also, New York looks good.

Seahawks at Cardinals
The conventional wisdom used to be that Seattle was good at home and bad on the road. After last week, though, it appears they’re just bad. Against an Arizona team that could have easily won at Minnesota last week, Seattle doesn’t have a chance.

Rams at 49ers
Every single one of ESPN’s “experts” picked San Francisco to knock off our Rams, but we think this game is far from the lock it’s being made out to be. Our system obligates us to pick San Fran, but we don’t have to like it.

Patriots at Steelers
New England somehow lost to Cleveland last week, and Pittsburgh is about a million times better. A Steelers win is just basic math.

Eagles at Redskins
Washington has had a week off to prepare for this division game, but something tells us it won’t go nearly as well for them as their last game against Philadelphia went.

Off this week:
Chargers
Packers
Raiders
Saints

The Ravens and Falcons played last night, so we’re ignoring them for this week.

Do drop by next Friday to see if we’re still on good terms with Mark Schlereth. Once again, there’s an NFL game on Thursday night, and once again, we can’t watch it, so pick it yourself. Have a safe weekend, and hey–let’s be careful out there.